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    微信幽默打招呼的句子 適合微信聊天的幽默句子

    更新時間: 2017-03-13 閱讀:

      在微信上和朋友聊天打招呼的時候,可以說一些幽默的句子逗大家開心一下。以下是學習啦小編為大家整理的微信幽默打招呼的句子,希望你們喜歡

    微信幽默打招呼的句子

      1.燒香的不一定是和尚,還可可以是熊貓。

      2.廢話是人際關系的第一句。

      3.結婚就是給自由穿件棉衣,活動起來不方便,但會很溫暖

      4.大師兄,你知道嗎?二師兄的肉現在比師傅的都貴了

      5.女人小時候的觀護所,長大后的監理所,結婚后的避難所。

      6.少女之心,美在無瑕;赤子之心,美在無邪;壯士之心,美在無畏;志士之心,美在無私。

      7.愛情是照相。需要黑暗才能成為照片。

      8.不要整天抱怨生活,生活根本就不會知道你是誰,更別說它會聽你的抱怨。

      9.為提高產品的安全性,我們決定在可樂瓶子瓶蓋上加印:請打開這一端;在瓶底上加印:請打開另一端。

      10.你是電,李四光,你是唯一的神話

      11.不要和我比懶,我懶得和你比。

      12.咱們是否可以找個地方喝上一杯,交個朋友?或者說,還是我直接把錢包給你?

      13.我不是廣場上算卦的,嘮不出那么多你愛聽的嗑。

      14.在埃及,一個男人可以娶四個老婆,那得多累啊,還是中國好。

      15.你還是讓我跪搓板吧,跪電暖氣是在受不了啊!

      16.打破老婆終身制,實行小姨股份制。引入小姐競爭制,推廣情人合同制。

      17.握著老婆的手,好象左手握右手;握著小姐的手,好象回到十八-九;握著女同學的手,后悔當初沒下手。

      18.給你點陽光你就燦爛,給你點洪水你就泛濫。我讓老太太抹紅嘴唇兒,給你點顏色看看。

      19.希望:領導順著你,汽車讓著你,鈔票貼著你,法院偏向你,官運伴著你,學校由著你,房產隨便你,戀人愛著你!

      20.男人二十是奔騰,三十是微軟,四十是松下,五十是聯想。

      21.單身是領悟,戀愛是失誤,分手是覺悟,結婚是錯誤,離婚是醒悟,再婚是執迷不悟,沒有情人是廢物,情人多了是動物。

      22.初見傾心,再見癡心。終日費心,欲得芳心。煞費苦心,想得催心。難道你心,不懂我心!

      23.笨笨男人+笨笨女人=結婚;笨笨男人+聰明女人=離婚;聰明男人+笨笨女人=婚外情;聰明男人+聰明女人=浪漫愛情;我們?

      24.種草不讓人去躺,不如改種仙人掌!

      25.我心眼兒有些小,但是不缺;我脾氣很好,但不是沒有!

    適合微信聊天的幽默句子

      1.人和豬的區別就是:豬一直是豬,而人有時卻不是人!

      2.原來只要是分開了的人,不論原來多么熟悉,也會慢慢變得疏遠。

      3.去披薩店買披薩!服務員問我是要切成8塊還是12塊?我想了想說:還是8塊吧!12塊吃不完!

      4.男人忽悠女人,叫調戲;女人忽悠男人,叫勾引;男女相互忽悠,叫愛情。

      5.政府想著怎么合理征稅,老板想著怎么合理避稅,而我想著怎么合理多睡!

      6.時間是用來流浪的,身軀是用來相愛的,生命是用來遺忘的,而靈魂,是用來歌唱的。

      7.愛情就象鬼,相信的人多,見到的人少

      8.永遠有多遠?你小子就給我滾多遠!

      9.給我一個姑娘,我可以創造一個民族。

      10.自從我變成了狗屎,就再也沒有人踩在我頭上了。

      11.我想早戀,但是已經晚了……

      12.天哪!我的衣服又瘦了。

      13.80后的重要任務是制造08后。

      14.人家有的是背景,而我有的只是背影~~。

      15.是金子總要發光的,但當滿地都是金子的時候,我自己也不知道自己是哪顆了。

    微信幽默打招呼的句子精選

      1.提醒大家要學會修自己的筆記本,這是很重要的!從前有個人,他不會修自己的筆記本……后來的事情大家都知道了。(來自陳冠希事件,不用再多說原因了吧)

      2.我不是廣場上算卦的,嘮不出那么多你愛聽的嗑。

      3.不是故事的結局不夠好,而是我們對故事的要求過多!

      4.鮮花往往不屬于賞花的人,而屬于牛糞。

      5.謊言與誓言的區別在于:一個是聽的人當真了,一個是說的人當真了。

      6.單身并不難,難的是應付那些千方百計想讓你結束單身的人。

      7.有時候,不是對方不在乎你,而是你把對方看的太重。

      8.就算是believe,中間也藏著一個lie。

      9.真正的好朋友,并不是在一起就有聊不完的話題,而是在一起,就算不說話,也不會覺得尷尬。

      10.沒有100分的另一半,只有50分的兩個人!


      看了微信幽默打招呼的句子的人還看:

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